iconoclast

Let me first just say Dawud Wharnsby’s latest album is the masterpiece we’ve been waiting for. The man has gone from singing cheesy ditties with devout red-haired puppets to reinventing himself by removing all references to “Allah” in his songs and belting out sappy, overwraught folk tunes to eerie tribal drums. Thankfully, with “Out Seeing The Fields”, Dawud has found his groove somewhere in between. He does not shy away from his fervent spirituality nor his unconventional perspectives on life; and the unabashed mixing of the two proves a formidable force. Throughout his songs, he readily declares his unequivocal love for God while simultaneously lashing out ferociously at those who would see worship and spirituality in narrow, compartmentalized terms.

My favorite track from the album, “The Truth That Lies Inside”, has these powerful lyrics:

I’ve been looking for answers
since becoming adult,
not looking for dogma to live like a cult.
I’ve been looking to live, I’ve been living to find,
freedom from cages that limit my mind.
So now here I am before God and you,
showing my face and my true self to you,
I’m not scared of God, I trust God understands,
But I’m wondering if you will still offer your hands,
Would you call me a hypocrite? Call me a liar?
Would you curse out my name?
Would you damn me to fire?
Would you know what to say,
or would you just walk away,
afraid the “me” I’ve tried to hide,
would too closely resemble,
the truth of you that lies inside?

Of course, his words wouldn’t have as much kick if they weren’t controversial. When I shared this with a friend, they loved at first, but took issue with a particular line: “I’m not scared of God, I trust God understands“. Their concern:

If the Prophet himself had fear in God as much as he loved Him, then we must love God just as much and fear his wrath if we do not. But I kept reading that line over and over and though how can you not be afraid of him? Because fear and love are two concepts that work together for a strong iman, just like His mercy and power of wrath are delineated in the Book. To say you are not afraid is like saying you are better than that, like you can stand up to Him and to say that is to also say you are better than the prophet for he had fear yet you do not?

Let me tell you how I see it.

Think of your mother.

You love her dearly, no doubt. You love to please her. Sometimes you do things you don’t really want to do because you know it makes her happy. When she’s upset or saddened, it tears you up inside. When she expresses anger or disappointment in you, you become angry and disappointed in yourself, and it crushes you like no other to be the object of her dissatisfaction. Because of this, you grow to fear displeasing her; you simply love her so much her pain becomes yours. But, and we must be clear about this, you don’t fear her. You fear her displeasure. The Prophet didn’t fear God, he loved Him so much that the very thought of being inadequate or failing to deliver His message ripped tears from his eyes. This is why he is the best of mankind, because of his unmatchable love. You and I would be damned near insane to proclaim ourselves better than him. That is why we must seek mirrors of this in other things, other actions, other people, that remind us of Him.

When Dawud says he isn’t scared of God, you must look at the context of the rest of the piece. God has commanded us to remember him in all positions; standing, sitting, reclining. And He has told us that the entire earth is a stage for prostration; worship can be found everywhere, not just in mosques or hallowed lecture halls. Dawud is saying he does not want others’ opinions and judgments to influence the way he worships; because he worships in the way most natural to him, he follows his fitra. Just as you do not fear your mother when you know deep-down you’ve tried your very best to please her (though it’s not often we try our hardest), so it is with the point Dawud is making. He is comparing his connection with God to his connection with others. He has achieved peace knowing his love for God overpowers anything else, so he is not scared that God will misinterpret his actions; God is all-knowing. Mankind is quick to assume, even quicker to judge and damn; but their rejection means nothing.

This is the essence of Dawud’s words; he isn’t scared God will misjudge him, rather God will take him for who he is. For the true believer with a doubt-free heart and an aptitude for repentance, God has promised his open embrace. This doesn’t mean we stop fearing His rejection -quite the opposite- but it is the fact of the rejection itself, not the form it may take, that pushes us to please him and keeps us on our knees. So while people may cry foul at us, stone us with their disdain, drum it into us that there is only one way of doing things; we remain content knowing whatever we do, it is only out of love for His sake. If you are true to yourself, then simply rise above the din and be happy with who you are. These cliches ring true.

Love isn’t an emotion. Love is emotion itself.